Today i saw 3 mothers with their kids in a cafe. the 3 mothers were around 30plus, they chatted non stop while their kids play with one another.
it makes me wonder how my life will be when i am at that age.
since awhile ago i look forward to turn 30 but now i am not so sure. looking at teenagers or anyone with the same age as me i feel very old. medicine and its constant need to keep reading has matured my brain much ahead of other people.
while i still yearn for adventures and to contribute to humanity, i pause now for a moment. being normal is much easier than being phenomenal.
i had thought that i would end 5 years of labour with improved dedication, my hopes are well buried. i cannot stop feeling that this 5 years is becoming draggy and exams are too routine to be bothered. there isnt much enthuisism in finishing strong.
that sense of failure i get when i was in the psychiatry osce last wed still lingers around. my very best subject, and yet i faltered and crumbled in that station.
what can keep me going in medicine?
soon i hope i will have an answer to this. because without that i dont know if i can last my working years.
it makes me wonder how my life will be when i am at that age.
since awhile ago i look forward to turn 30 but now i am not so sure. looking at teenagers or anyone with the same age as me i feel very old. medicine and its constant need to keep reading has matured my brain much ahead of other people.
while i still yearn for adventures and to contribute to humanity, i pause now for a moment. being normal is much easier than being phenomenal.
i had thought that i would end 5 years of labour with improved dedication, my hopes are well buried. i cannot stop feeling that this 5 years is becoming draggy and exams are too routine to be bothered. there isnt much enthuisism in finishing strong.
that sense of failure i get when i was in the psychiatry osce last wed still lingers around. my very best subject, and yet i faltered and crumbled in that station.
what can keep me going in medicine?
soon i hope i will have an answer to this. because without that i dont know if i can last my working years.
No comments:
Post a Comment